“Pleased to meet you
Hope you guess my name
But what’s puzzling you
Is the nature of my game”
So goes the lyrics from Rolling Stone’s Sympathy for the Devil. In the Season 5 premiere of SPN we’re introduced to Satan (Mark Pellegrino) himself and the nature of his game is indeed a puzzle, but boy is it gonna be fun figuring it out.
Kripke penned this opener and it started exactly where we left off. Blinding light. Piercing noise. The boys can’t escape and drop to their knees in agony waiting for Lucifer’s arrival and then we see…
…Yosemite Sam. The boys are inexplicably on an airplane with the Looney Tune on TV and a cartoon beezlebub is asking him, “What the devil is your name?”
WTF?
The boys are just as confused as we are. On the ground the radio is delivering apocalyptic news on every channel and Sam keeps trying to apologize, but Dean cuts him off. In need of answers they head for Chuck’s. The prophet is shocked to see them alive seeing as his last vision showed Sammy going “full on Vader.” He tells them Castiel is dead. An arch-angel smoked the crap out of him and he “exploded like a water balloon of chunky soup.” Ew. Even more ew is the tooth the soothsayer finds in his hair.
“Cram it with walnuts, Ugly.” Dean
Then that abhorrent angel Zachariah shows up to get Dean. He tells them they’re all on the same side now and he wants Dean to kill the devil. Furthermore, they need to strike hard and fast before Lucifer finds a vessel. P.O.’d, Dean slaps Zach back on the Highway to Heaven.
Back at their hotel Dean asks Sam how he’s doing with his blood addiction. Surprisingly, whoever yanked their tushes outta trouble seems to have cleansed Sam too--supernatural sobriety. Once again, Sam tries to talk to Dean, but he’s not in the mood to listen. Instead he suggests they do what they always do and go hunting…for the devil.
Meanwhile, in Pike Creek, Delaware, we meet a despondent man named Nick who’s haunted by the loss of his wife, Sarah, and their baby boy. He thinks he’s having hallucinations, but Sarah tells him he’s special, chosen. You know, whenever, if ever, someone tells you that…run!
And, in the funniest part of the episode, we meet Becky, Supernatural super fan and giggly, blushy WinCest writer. In a totally surreal moment she gets a video call from the Carver Edlund. He’s being watched by angels and he wants her to deliver a message to the real Sam and Dean. She shows up on their motel doorstep drooling and giddy where she wastes no time in fondling Sam’s pecs and telling Dean “You’re not what I pictured.” She also tells them Carver’s newest prophecy. Michael’s sword is on Earth. The angels lost it and it’s at a castle on a hill made of 42 dogs. Well, now, that’s clear as mud isn’t it? So who do the Winchesters call when they need some research help? Bobby.
Bobby shows up and explains that Michael booted Lucifer to Earth with that sword and if they can get it they can send him back to Hell. Then Sam does what he’s been trying to do with Dean for days…he confesses his sins. And Bobby, dear, Bobby completely pulverizes him. “You’re damn right you didn’t listen. You were reckless and selfish and arrogant. You’re sorry you started Armageddon. This kind of thing don’t get forgiven, boy. And if by some miracle we pull this off, I want you to lose my number, you understand me?”
Gulp. The devastation on Sam’s face is crushing. He leaves ostensibly to go look for something, but probably to secretly cry, and Dean and Bobby do more research. Bobby is saying he never would’ve guessed their daddy was right about Sam. Save him or kill him. Sadly, Dean never says anything in his brother’s defense, but he does have an epiphany and digs through his dad’s stuff. His storage locker is at Castle Storage on 42 Rover Hill. Bingo! And then bam! Bobby goes all demon on Dean and starts beating him. Meg arrives in a new meat suit. She says Dean is the only bump in the road for the new world order and every demon is out to get him. She tells Bobby to stab him to death. Bobby fights his inner demon and stabs himself instead and Meg smokes out. The boys get their surrogate father to the ER and then try to beat the demons to the storage locker. Zach is waiting for them. He tells them Dean is actually Michael’s sword aka his vessel. That’s right, Zacariah wants Dean to willingly give up his body and mind to Michael.
“Life as an angel condom.” Dean
Dean refuses and Zacariah starts to torture him into saying yes – he breaks Sam’s legs, gives Dean stage 4 stomach cancer, steals Sam’s lungs. Dean tells him to just kill them and Zacariah says he’s just started the torture. Thankfully, a very put together Castiel shows up and kicks some angel ass. He then implies that God put Sam and Dean on that plane and spared his life. To protect the brothers he carves something into their ribs that will hide them from every angel in creation, including Lucifer.
Back in Pike Creek, Nick allows his “wife” to talk him into becoming Lucifer’s vessel so he can get revenge on God for allowing a stranger to butcher his family. Possession takes place.
Oblivious, a feisty Bobby gives his doctor hell when the MD dares to tell him he may not be able to walk again. In the ER the guys discuss what they should do about their little Satanic sitch. Bobby suggests they save as many as they can for as long as they can. Dean suggests they take on both sides and win back their planet.
“What I do have is a GED and a give ‘em hell attitude.” Dean
As the boys head out of the hospital Bobby tells Sam it was the demon talking to him that way not him. “I ain’t cutting you out, boy. Not ever.” Sniff sniff. Now that’s more like the Bobby we know and love.
The jam-packed episode ends in a dark parking lot with Dean finally letting loose. He tells Sam he said all that stuff in there for Bobby’s benefit, but he can’t pretend anymore that everything is alright. He also tells his little brother he can’t believe Sam chose a demon over him. Sammy completely let him down and he’s having a hard time forgiving and forgetting. When Sam asks what he can do to make things better Dean says, “Honestly, nothing. We can never be what we were. I just don’t think I can trust you.”
Gut-wrenching pain. It’s a devastating, but true moment. They might be fighting on the same side to save the world, but chances are their separate hearts will make it that much more difficult and probably weaken their efforts. However, I have every faith the wayward son will make amends and earn his way back into good graces.
Overall, I thought Kripke did a killer job on starting off Season 5. I’ll admit I balked a little at Sammy’s instant sobriety, but I can see that it would be a distraction from the real issues at hand. I’m looking forward to seeing the Harvelles next week and watching more emotional fallout among the brothers. How about you?
