Recap for "Point of No Return"

The 100th episode began with Zachariah (aka the angel we love to hate) in a bar, drinking away his sorrows just like the businessman next to him who got a pink slip. He bemoans not sealing the deal. Next thing we know, things start shaking. And we all know nothing good happens when things start shaking. Stuart, the fired businessman, says, "Earthquake?" Zachariah responds, "Nah. My boss." Zachariah is offered some new deal and he calmly finishes his drink and leaves the bar -- and its deal occupants -- behind.

Next we see a heartbreaking, man at the end of his rope scene with Dean. He's filling a box with his leather jacket, his car keys, his gun, and addressing it to Bobby. But before he can go any further with his plan, Sam turns up with Cas and Cas zaps them back to Bobby's. One of the most heart-wrenching things Dean has ever said was when he looked at Bobby, after Bobby had called him "son", and said, "You're not my father, and you ain't in my shoes." The look on Bobby's face -- before he got mad -- showed such hurt because he does feel like the boys' father. They're the only family he has left. But Bobby gets his point across about not giving up when he pulls out a gun and a bullet and admits that he thinks about killing himself every day but that he doesn't because he promised Dean he wouldn't.

Cas gets a pain in his head and disappears from the room only to reappear in a forest. He sees a spot in the ground moving, but before he can examine it too closely, he has to fight off two angels. When he does get back to the strange spot, a hand emerges -- one belonging to the now-back-alive younger Winchester brother, Adam. Turns out Adam was in Heaven, making out with a girl at prom, when Zachariah came and told him he was Michael's vessel and he would help defeat the devil.

Sam pleads with Adam to give them time to come up with another plan, and he asks what they've got so far. Loved the following exchage:

Dean: "We're working on the power of love."
Adam: "How's that going?"
Dean: "Not good."

I think the casting of Adam is fantastic. He looks like he could be Sam and Dean's brother, and he even has some of the same snark and resentment toward John. And how Jake Abel portrayed the real Adam is so much more believable than the fake Adam we saw previously.

Sam has locked Dean in Bobby's panic room (hello, payback!) to keep him from going to do something "Michael stupid". When he goes to talk to Dean, big bro says that he won't have Adam taking a bullet for him and that he's tired of fighting who he's meant to be. Sam says he believes that Dean will do the right thing, but Dean admits that he doesn't have the same faith in Sam. Damn, how many more of these heart-wrenching moments can we stand?

Sam and Dean try to tell him that the angels are liars, but Adam has a dream in which he talks to Zachariah and tips the angels off to where he is and is taken by the angels. He ends up in that same beautiful room full of beer, stacks of cheeseburgers and paintings on the walls that Dean once did. And Zachariah tells him he was just bait to get Dean because everyone knows Sam and Dean will come for Adam. They're like that with family. Dean manages to banish Cas with that angel-banishing symbol and takes off. But after Cas finds him and beats the living daylights out of him before bringing him back to Bobby's, Dean has learned the following lesson:

"Word to the wise. Don't piss off the nerd angels." :)

Of course, as Zachariah predicted, Sam and Dean ride to Adam's rescue. They're surprised to find out the beautiful room is an abandoned muffler factory in Van Nuys, California, but I thought that was so hilariously perfect. But this time, it's not just Sam and Dean taking on the superior forces. They have Nerd Angel on their side! And Cas proceeds to kick some butt, killing one angel and banishing the other four as well as himself.

They find Adam, Zachariah reveals himself, nasty exchange ensues, Zach makes Adam and Sam hemorrhage from the mouth, and Dean says "yes." But he has conditions -- he has a list of people he wants to keep safe, and Michael has to kill Zachariah. Zach laughs at this, but not for long because Dean pulls out one of those angel blades and kills Zach. Then he rushes for the door with Sam, with Adam following, as Michael arrives. Adam gets stuck in the room, and we assume that he is either dead or is now Michael's vessel. Guess only time will tell.

We end with Dean and Sam driving down the road, and Dean begins to come out of the defeated funk he's been in the past few episodes.

Dean: "Screw destiny. I saw we take the fight to them. Do it out way."
Sam: "Sounds good."

Is it me or was there only the one song on the jukebox in the first bar scene? A little surprising that they didn't work in "Point of No Return" by Kansas.

It's Not Depression, It's The Ordeal

I see a lot of comments about the last few episodes that have some form of "that's so depressing!" in them. They're not necessarily complaints, some are witty, most are wailing and lamenting Dean's pain, but they all talk about how heavy the despair of our show is.

Supernatural is currently in stage 8 of the hero's journey as analyzed by Joseph Campbell and applied to modern storytelling by Christopher Vogler: The Ordeal. This is when all seems lost, when the hero confronts death, his greatest fear, or his most difficult choices. Dean, of course, is facing all three.

Sera Gamble has said Dean will hit rock bottom, and judging by the preview for tomorrow's episode, this is it. This is the moment in the fight scene where the hero is getting pummeled and suddenly finds the strength to turn the tide and fight back. But first, he has to give in to the pressure, the weight, he has to see what it's like to give up.

A number of things combined to bring Dean to this point, and I don't think he would have arrived here if any of them had been missing. First, Bobby seemed to give up. He didn't say the words, but it was clear that killing his wife again had at least temporarily broken his spirit, what little was left after he wound up in the wheelchair.

Then they die and go to heaven, and it's pile-on time. Dean confronts his losses* (Mary, Ash, Pamela, Jo and Ellen [obviously, the latter two not literally]) and gets the hard sell from Pamela about how heaven isn't so bad for those who die, and why not just let it happen**? At the same time, Sam's heaven sticks knife after knife into Dean's heart*** and God is just another deadbeat dad****.

Dean lost a lot all at once. By the time they got to Blue Earth, Minnesota, he'd been chewing on what he had left for a while. Beset by demons, facing one of Hell's horrors, seeing what it can do and knowing that the longer he and Sam hold out without destroying Lucifer, the worse things will get, it makes sense that he'd decide to end it the other way. The logic is there. If it's inevitable, if people can suffer for years this way and they can't ever win, why not speed it up?

Dean needs something to hold on to. Some reason to dig in his heels and resist. Could it be Lisa and Ben? Someone asked why it was Lisa and not Cassie. That's a good question, because he and Cassie had a lot more history than he and Lisa did. But his feelings for Cassie were young and immature. What he had with Lisa (not the bendy weekend, afterward) was all potential, but it was mature. It was who Dean is today, how he's been shaped over the last four years, what he wants for his future and believes he can't have. He and Lisa may or may not be meant for each other, but that's not really the point. Potential is the point.

Now, using them in a bargain isn't smart. Dean will be giving the enemy more ammunition. He can hold out when Bobby's paralyzed and Sam's got no lungs because they signed up for this gig, but Lisa and Ben are innocents. I doubt Dean's thinking of that—he's only thinking that he's got something the angels want, and if they want it, he wants something in return. Somewhere along the line, he'd better realize he can't trust any kind of bargain the angels agree to.

*Interesting that Dean sees Mary, at a time when John was not around, but never sees or considers that he will see John. I'm sure part of this is JDM's availability (or their desire to save him for the end, maybe? please?), but the writing is solid—Dean doesn't have many happy memories of John.

**Because Dean is humanity's champion, and life is not about dying, it's about living. People die every day without the apocalypse, but at least most of them get a chance, and sometimes a choice. Sure, many will wind up in heaven, but not all, and some of them will be coerced into going the other way (ref. Jane's murder of Paul last week). And before they get there, they might endure all the horrors Dean and Sam have fought so hard to defeat. He might have temporarily lost sight of that, in the relief of giving in, but it will galvanize him. I'm sure of it!

***Sam didn't really get a chance to explain, but he never saw his escapes as rejection of Dean. It will take a lot to convince Dean of that, and we might not get to see it (chick flick moments, you know), but somehow Sam will have to convince Dean that he's just as important to Sam as Sam is to him.

****I know the religion connection bothers a lot of people, but as an exploration of relationships, I LOVE this. Who doesn't ask how God could let horrible things happen? If humans are made in his image, why can't he be fallible, too? Why can't he also give in to despair and the relief of washing his hands of the problem? Ooooh, how would Dean feel to be told he and God have a lot in common?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
The Rest of the Journey:

I have worked really hard...most of the time...to avoid spoilers. But today I couldn't resist and I clicked a link for promo photos of tomorrow night's episode, and saw...um...a spoiler. It made me mad! So of course, while I was writing this post, I went to IMDb to look at the summaries for past episodes, and read the writeup for next week. Which spoiled me again! I'm very excited, because it sounds like a super awesome episode and the specific spoiler makes me soooooo gleeful, but I wish I hadn't known.

Anyway, as sad as I am that we're down to 5 episodes remaining this season, I'm on the edge of my seat to see them:

Point of No Return

Hammer of the Gods

The Devil You Know

Two Minutes to Midnight

Swan Song

Weekly Supernatural News Round-Up

Of course, the big news is that new episodes are back (yay!) and we're coming up on the much discussed 100th episode. But what about beyond 100? Here are some highlights!

This week's soundbites included a Zap2it interview (including video) with Jim Beaver, who tried to avoid any real spoilers for what might be in store for Bobby.

Also this week, an update on Ghostfacers web spinoff, to coincide with 100th ep.

And of course, we get the devil's side of things in a Sci-Fi Wire interview (Apr. 8) with Mark Pellegrino. Dean and Sam aside, Mark says Lucifer is really the good guy! (He says interesting things are afoot but steers clear of major spoilers. You guys can search those out yourselves at spoiler tv and the like!)

99 Problems

99 Problems starts off fast and furious with Sam and Dean in a high speed race. Sam is hurt, the boys are outnumbered by pursuing demons and they’ve just reached a dead end. Cue the calvary. Or in this case, the Sacrament Lutheran Militia. Armed with a tank of holy water and a fire hose, the group saves the Winchesters.

“I hate to tell you, but those are demons and this is the apocalypse. So buckle up!” SLM member

Sam and Dean are shocked to find this small town in the know. The church serves as their base, the pistol packing preacher as their leader and they’ve got twelve-year-olds packing salt rounds.

“I don’t know whether to run screaming or buy a condom.” - Dean

Even more shocking…the preacher’s daughter, Lea, is a prophet. She’s the one telling the town how to protect themselves. The boys leave a message for Castiel and decide to stick around to see what they can learn, despite Dean sounding like he’s given up. They join a group of hunters and experience what it’s like to work with a team. Unfortunately, Dillon, a likeable young teen, is killed under Sam and Dean’s watch and his mother blames them.

At his funeral Lea has a vision. She announces that Dillon will return from the dead. He’ll be resurrected on Judgment Day. Everyone in the town will be reunited with their departed loved ones and they’ll enjoy paradise on Earth. The angels have chosen them. All they have to do is follow their commandments.

“No drinking, no gambling, no premarital sex. Dean, they basically just outlawed 90% of your personality.” - Sam

Dean goes to see Lea. He’s so desperate to find some hope, to find something to renew his faith. She assures him they’re about to face a prize fight, but they will emerge victorious and well rewarded.

Meanwhile, Sam goes to the town pub where he and Paul, the bartender, bond over their rebellion. An annoyed Sam later returns to the hotel room venting about being trapped in a fundamentalist compound. Dean could care less. Again, he hints that he’s ready to give up. Sam tells him he can’t do that. He can’t count on anyone else and he can’t do it alone.

Dean breaks curfew and heads out to clear his head. He finds the bartender being attacked by the townies because of Lea’s new vision. According to her, they won’t be rewarded with paradise if they don’t take care of the sinners. Dean tries to save Paul, but Dillon’s despondent mother shoots him, not wanting anything to ruin her chance at reuniting with her son.

“I found a liquor store and I drank it.” - Castiel


Castiel finally pops in, very drunk and depressed. He informs them Lea is NOT a prophet, but a whore. She rises when Lucifer walks the Earth and bears false prophecy. She can read minds and take human form, but her main purpose is to turn the townies on each other and condemn as many souls to hell as possible. The only way to kill her it to have a servant of Heaven stab her with a stake made from a cypress tree in Babylon. The boys persuade the preacher to stab the thing that looks like his daughter.

When they get to the church they find Lea has stuffed a storage room with “sinners”, including children, and intends to torch them with kerosene. Her dad tries to stab her and she convinces her followers he’s a demon. Fighting ensues. Lea attacks Dean and taunts him, calling him pathetic, self-hating and faithless. Dean grabs the stake and stabs her. It shouldn’t work…but it does. The demon smokes out and her minions realize they’ve made a terrible mistake.

“Are you going to do something stupid? Like Michael stupid.” – Sam

Cas and the preacher are hurt. Dean and Sam take them to the hotel where Sam senses that something has shifted in Dean. He tries to get his big brother to stay, but Dean takes off. He shows up on his old girlfriend’s doorstep. He tells Lisa (The Kids are Alright and Dream a Little Dream of Me) he knows how things are going to end for him and he’s okay with that, but he wants her to know when he thinks about being happy he imagines himself with her and her son. Then he tells her things are going to get scary soon, but she shouldn’t worry because he’s going to make arrangements to keep her and Ben safe. He’s going to do what he needs to, but under his conditions. Lisa tries desperately to get him to explain, to stay, but Dean tearfully kisses her goodbye and leaves to meet his fate.

Damn…he is going to do something Michael stupid. Did Dean break your heart as much as he did mine?

Supernatural: The Musical

Okay, so I also love Glee, and one of my all-time favorite Buffy episodes is Once More with Feeling. I thought, hey, Supernatural, the musical. So I pared down the series to bare bones and tried to find songs for the turning points.

Disclaimer: Some of the songs I picked JUST for the title, not the lyrics.

Dean comes to get Sam to help him find his dad.

Jessica is killed when Sam returns, causing Sam to return to the hunting life.

Song: Highway to Hell

The boys hunt all manner of beasties.

Song: Life is a Highway

Sam begins to learn he has psychic powers, which he hides from Dean.

Song: Am I a Demon by Danzig

Dean finds out, and believes him.

Song: He Ain’t Heavy, He’s My Brother

They find out there are other kids like him, that lost their mother the same way.

Their quest takes them to their childhood home, restored and haunted by something evil—and their mother.

Song: Can’t Find My Way Home by Blind Faith

They are reunited with their dad.

Song: Reunited (I couldn’t resist)

Their dad is kidnapped and possessed and tries to kill them.

Instead of killing Daddy, Sam shoots him in the leg, releasing the demon.

Angry Daddy, beat-up Dean and Sam drive off, only to be t-boned by a truck.

Dean is dying.

Song: Knocking on Heaven’s Door

Daddy makes a deal to save him, and dies.

Song: Had a Dad by Jane’s Addiction

Dean is consumed with guilt, only to be made better when he goes back on the hunt.

They find more psychic children, and Sam goes off on his own, where he’s hunted down by Gordon.

Sam is kidnapped by the YED and forced to fight against the other psychic children for the dubious honor of leading Azazel’s army.

Sam dies.

Song: Nice to be Dead by Iggy Pop

Dean makes a deal to bring Sam back.

Song: I Can’t Live by Badfinger (I know….I tried to find something that WASN’T about love)

Dean kills the YED after the gates of hell have been opened.

Song: Ego Tripping at the Gates of Hell by Flaming Lips

Sam and Dean are at odds with the rest of the hunting community because they allowed the gates of hell to be opened and a bunch of demons are running around.

Ruby, a witch-turned-demon, comes to help them, though they don’t trust her.

Song: Witchy Woman

Dean is dealing with the fact that he has one year to live and can’t do anything about it or Sam dies.

Song: Live Like You Were Dying by Tim McGraw

Sam has to watch Dean die over and over in a place called Mystery Spot, to show him how helpless he is.

The boys encounter an old nemesis, Agent Hendrickson, who arrests them.

Song: In the Jailhouse Now

Sam reveals that Ruby told him a demon named Lilith has been looking for him. Lilith comes to the jail after Dean and Sam leave and levels it, killing all inside.

Then Lilith comes for Dean and unleashes the hellhounds. Dean dies.

Song: Fade to Black by Metallica

Dean crawls his way out of the grave.

Song: Ain’t No Grave (Gonna Hold This Body Down) by Johnny Cash

He meets an angel named Castiel.

Song: Send Me an Angel by Real Life

The brothers are needed to help stop Lilith from breaking the 66 seals needed to set Lucifer free.

They later learn Dean broke the first seal by torturing souls in hell.

Song: Straight to Hell by The Clash

Sam has learned, while Dean is gone, that he can be more powerful with his psychic powers when he drinks demon blood. He’s become addicted.

Song: Dirty Little Secret by All American Rejects

The brothers fight violently when Sam tells Dean he’s the better hunter, that Dean is too weak, and Dean is pissed because Sam is still in touch with Ruby.

The brothers discover someone is writing their life story, and he’s a prophet named Chuck.

Song: The Prophets Song by Queen

Dean discovers Sam has a demon blood addiction.

Song: Lay It on the Line

Ruby tricks Sam into killing Lilith, which is the final seal, and Lucifer rises.

Song: Apocalypse Please by Muse

The boys are in the middle of a battle between Lucifer and the angels.

Song: Everybody Wants to Rule the World by Tears for Fears

Lucifer claims Sam is his vessel, and Sam refuses.

Song: Devil’s Plaything by Danzig

The archangel Michael wants Dean as his vessel, that it’s destiny, and Dean refuses.

They look for answers in God, only to learn that God doesn’t think it’s his problem.

Song: God and Satan by Biffy Clyro

Supernatural News

New Ghostfacers online show to debut April 15. Get the deets here.

Julie McNiven (Anna) has signed on for a five-episode guest arc on Stargate Universe. Yay, two of my favorite shows collide! Oh, and for fans of Robert Knepper (Prison Break and Heroes), he's signed on for some guest spots on SGU too. Both will be playing members of the Lucian Alliance, aka space pirates.

Jim Beaver's memoir, Life's That Way, comes out in paperback April 6. Here he talks about it and the upcoming season 6 of SPN.

Mark Pellegrino talks about the two ambiguous characters he plays -- Jacob on LOST and Lucifer on Supernatural.

Want to see Jensen playing guitar and singing with Jason Manns at Jus in Bello? Click here.

And here's some fun video of Misha crashing Jared and Jensen's panel. Courtesy of SupernaturalWiki's Twitter feed.

Some pics from the Jus in Bello con, complete with Jared wearing his brand new wedding ring.

Dark Side of the Moon

Okay, so, I had a thing to do with Number Two tonight, which got me home late, which meant starting tonight's episode about 45 minutes late. Number One turned on the TV, hit the playlist, and the DVR froze. It acted funky for a minute, then reset.

Argh

When it came back on, luckily, we found that despite the ominous black screen when we tried to play the recording the first time, Supernatural did, indeed, record. Except for about six minutes. Let's hope they weren't the most important six minutes of the entire season or something!

THEN
Lots of good stuff here, about the boys dying (again and again and again and again and again and then one more time), about God and the amulet. Meaty, yummy foreshadowing. Yay! Good music, too.

NOW
Lots of booze in this hotel room, bottles and cans everywhere. Dean sleeping, gun on him, guy has Dean's pistol, now how the hell did he get that out from under Dean's head without waking him? Ah. Bottles and cans. I get it.

Dean recognizes the two guys holding guns on him and his brother, but they don't care. Righteous bastards. They kill Sam, then Dean, but not before Dean makes the scariest eye threats ever. Boom, right to the title card that gives me a thrill every single week. Nice transition!

Knock Knock Knocking on Heaven's Door
Dean's dozing in the Impala in the middle of the road. Then young Sam (yay, Colin Ford!) draws Dean into a truly happy memory. I swear, I've never seen Dean look like this. This music might be nearly as perfect as Renegade was. But the fireworks' sharp reports remind Dean of the shotguns and their deaths...

PAMELA! ASH! MARY! Woo hoo! (Yes, I let the guest star list distract me from the scene. Sorry.)

Cas comes on the radio and tells Dean he's in heaven. He tells him to follow the road, which is apparently symbolic up in heaven there. Dean drives on and finds Sam getting hit on by an 11-year-old girl while her family is nice to him on Thanksgiving. Dean pulls Sam out of the memory (that Sam thinks is a dream) and the memory goes on without them. Nice to know they end up in heaven, though they're both pretty surprised.

They're trying to understand how it works. Dean's not too pleased that one of Sam's "greatest hits" is Thanksgiving at someone else's house. Then there's a very archangel-ish roar-and-shake-and-bright-light. They hide, it moves on, and Dean tries to reach Cas through the radio. This time we get him on a crappy old TV (was Sam 11 in the 1950s?).

"Don't go into the light!"

Cas is excited that the boys are in heaven, though he's also obviously resentful because he can't go back. He wants them to find Joshua, an angel who is rumored to have God's ear. They want to know what God has to say. Cas tell them the road winds through heaven, and they need to follow it to the garden.

Dean's gung ho, Sam's surprised, but Dean says God is the only one who can help. "The last hope of a desperate man."

Apparently, the road is symbolic in many ways. "Finding a road in a closet would be pretty much the most normal thing to happen to us today." And guess what? He finds a road in the closet! A toy racetrack!

It brings them home, where Dean is wearing an "I wuv hugs" shirt that Sam immediately busts him for. Mom, looking young and gorgeous in a sundress, offers Dean lunch.

Pure Torture
Dean revels in his memory, being waited on by Mom, and showered with affection and loving looks. But poor Sam, whom Mary doesn't see because it's not his memory, has to just sit and watch. He wants to move on, but Dean isn't aware of how much it must hurt his brother.

Mary takes a call from John, and Dean remembers that they fought and Dad moved out for two days. Sam says Dad always said it was a perfect marriage. Dean says it wasn't perfect until after she died. He comforts her, says Dad still loves her, and he loves her too, and hey, here's why Dean loves pie!

I had a...um...debate with a friend in January about Dean's love of pie. She pointed out that it was cakehole in the pilot, then piehole after, and did Dean's love of pie really mean anything? I hypothesized that while I doubted they knew at the beginning of season 1 that Dean loved pie and why, its usage wasn't random. That they deliberately sprinkled it into episodes as the seasons went on. She expressed the lack of belief that that was true--not that she thought it was untrue, but that she didn't know. I was absolutely convinced I was right. I have no idea if the writers knew this scene was coming, and deliberately prepped us for it with "I like pie!" and "Bring me some pie!" and Dean being turned off by pie in "Yellow Fever." But I do believe there was at least a subconsciously deliberate plan. I've had it happen to me enough times, where I was writing something, a revelation hits me, and I go back to plant seeds, only to find them already there, perfectly lined up right where they should be. That's got to be harder to do for a TV show, but Kripke did know approximately where he was going, so who knows?

Okay, big tangent! Pie! Geez! But here's some more poignancy, Dean's love of pie keeping him connected to his mommy. *sniff*

Sam comments on how long Dean has been cleaning up Dad's messes, which is enough to galvanize Dean into searching for the next piece of "road." It's a postcard for Route 66, which takes them to another efficiency apartment and Sam's dog, Bones. Dean asks if it's Flagstaff, and while Sam's joyous over the memory of living on his own for two weeks, Dean's angry because of the torment and probably abuse it caused him.

Uh oh.

Jared's real-life love of dogs is apparent in the way he pets and looks at poor Bonesy. He follows Dean out the door, but this isn't good. The new memory is again Sam's. He tries to pretend he doesn't recognize it, but Dean gets it. The night Sam ditched them for Stanford. And Dean doesn't need more to understand the pattern.

Sam's version of heaven is leaving his brother, and I don't know how it works up there, because it's Dean's version of hell—"The worst night of my life."

Zachariah has found them, though. They run, but Zach turns on the sun, and threatens some pretty ugly torture. He's going to make them beg to say yes before he sends them back to Earth. The boys run, and he's there every time, until a guy in a wrestling mask and cape rescues them.

The Roadhouse
It's ASH! "Welcome to my Blue Heaven," he says, and gestures with a flourish at Harvelle's.

"It even smells the same."
"Bud, blood, and beer nuts. Best smell in the world."

Ash explains the Supernatural concept of Heaven to the boys, and IMO, it's pretty cool. Well, that's because it's pretty much how I decided the afterlife must be back when I was in high school. Everyone who goes to heaven gets their own special paradise. Dean doesn't seem too keen on the idea of everyone being alone, trapped. Ash says there are special cases of sharing. You know. Soulmates.

Gah! Why, Andrew and Daniel, why must you feed the Wincesters so?!

Anyway, Ash is, of course, special. He's not like everyone else. He can go anywhere in heaven. He has a "holy roller police scanner" where he can tap into the angels speaking Enochian, and—also of course—he's fluent. He reveals that he's found Dean and Sam up here before, but the angels wiped their memories. Sam asks if he found Ellen and Jo, and Ash is pretty torn up to learn they died.

He hasn't found Mary and John, though he's been looking. Huh. Ash knew the boys for, like, three weeks, lived a whole life before that, but his heaven is tracking down the Winchester parents and (repeatedly) saving Sam and Dean? Iiiiinteresting.

So he hasn't found John and Mary, but he has found Pamela! Kind of odd, since he presumably didn't know her in life. But I could be wrong, maybe he did.

Pamela slaps Dean for getting her killed, Dean says if it makes her feel any better, they got Ash killed, too. "I'm cool with it!" Ash yells. Gosh, I love that guy.

While Ash and Sam work on the laptop, Pamela tells Dean she's happy, at peace, and maybe Dean shouldn't fight so hard against Michael. Sure, people will die, but then they come here. Dean's definitely not convinced.

Ash has found a shortcut to the garden and draws some symbols on the walls, cautioning that Zach will be watching all roads to the garden. Pamela hugs Sam, and gives Dean a big ol' kiss that's "just how she imagined." For a guy who gets laid a lot (or used to), Dean is regularly bemused by a simple kiss.

Heaven is Hell
They exit, but are suddenly back home again. This isn't right. Here's Mary again, looking like she did the night she died. She asks if Dean had a nightmare. He's no longer interested in wallowing, so he tries to leave, but Mary offers to tell her nightmare. The night she burned. Oooh, this is a new side to Samantha Smith. She tells Dean she didn't love him, he was her burden, she was shackled to him. Her eyes go yellow, and we go to commercial...

And FRAK, my recording glitches, and mid-commercial it cuts back to the show, with a stranger telling the boys he just trims the hedges. He says they're going home, but it's different this time. This time, God wants them to remember.

They wake up violently in the motel room, clothes bloody but bodies whole. But not, quite obviously, their spirits. Dean makes a call, then they're packing and Cas is there. He hopes Joshua is lying—clearly, they told him about the six minutes I missed. Cas curses God and gives Dean back his worthless amulet. Sam is determined to find another way, to stop everything, tells Dean "We'll find it. You and me. We'll find it."

But in the worst Supernatural moment EVER, Dean drops his amulet in the trash.

*sob*

I don't even know why he did it. I mean, we saw it coming, with Sam's heaven being away from Dean, but it had to get worse in those moments I missed. But even without seeing them, they've shattered me.

Sam, if you don't save that amulet, I will kill you.